You’ve probably heard of schizophrenia as a mental disease that means that one person has multiple personalities. In fact, you’ve probably come across the concept of schizophrenia in a thriller film – or possibly by watching the original Psycho where Hitchcock touches the subject with a motel keeper who plays both himself and his mother. Anyway, schizophrenia seems to be associated with crimes and horror by the media. So you might not have noticed that you too when you juggle with the joys of parenthood with a young baby, have become an expert at playing several roles at the same time. After a baby, your role in your family changes dramatically. There’s no saying that it’s a bad thing, but it’s nevertheless important that you become aware of the social expectations on you if you want to keep your sanity!
I’m a parent to my child
There’s nothing that displays as clearly the role of carer that parents have than having a newborn who needs your attention all the time. When a baby arrives in the family, you suddenly discover that you need a mile-long list of essentials that you never considered before. Sleeping cots, plenty of clothes – babies need changing several times a day – and food and nappy products, and a lot of sensory toys to help them grow. Gradually, your baby grows. A toddler needs to explore the world with their parents and to be shown discipline. A child will need you to answer difficult questions about life and death and to encourage them to embrace their passions. A teenager needs someone they can trust. Your parenting role will evolve from carer/feeder to role model and confident.
I will become a parent to my parents
At the same time that your child grows tall and big, your parents grow old and weak. Suddenly, you might find that you need to look after your parents and care for their health. Your relationship changes and you’re the one doing the parenting now. For most families, it can be difficult to accept that old relatives are not independent anymore. You can, however, look for solutions that allow them to maintain a certain level of independence within the right structure. Porthaven residential care is a good place to start looking if you want a modern and friendly structure for your parents. Modern home cares are now build to include facilities such as restaurants, hairdressing salon and private dining for seniors with physical and mental needs. This is the best solution for your parents and yourself, as taking them with home is a difficult choice that demands sacrifices and special training.
I am not a child to my parents anymore
Even when your parents are still mentally and physically fit, having a baby transforms the relationship you had with them. The mother needs to become a mother-graduate, while the daughter has now become an ex-child. Sounds complicated? Think of it this way. Having a baby makes you officially part of the adult world in the eyes of your parents. Consequently, the relationship you have with them evolves from a parent-to-child situation to equal adults.
Having a baby changes your life forever. But it also changes the way other people see you and the role you hold with them. From a carer to a confident, your relationship with your child will define their emotional health. For your parents, you instantly become an equal, and it’s a role you want to maintain via special care in their older age.