Men love women, but it’s easy to see why they find us confusing. We communicate in such a different way that it can seem like we speak another language. Learning why we do and say what we do can eradicate some of the confusion, so let’s start off with some of the most common aspects of the female persona that men find confusing:
We’re women. We have periods and get pregnant, so unfortunately that means our hormones dictate large sections of our lives. Yes, that means we might be laughing one minute and sobbing the next. We might cry over the sight of a cute kitten on the TV and a minute later be screaming at you for making some trivial comment. If you think you’ve got it bad on the receiving end, imagine how we feel!
2. Being right all the time
We are 😉
Women find it hard to give a straight answer. We’ll probably tell you we’re fine even though we’re crying our eyes out, and we could do a disappearing act after a first date we didn’t enjoy. Instead we should tell you why we’re upset or text you to say sorry, I’m not interested. We’re not trying to be dishonest, that’s just not the way the female mind works.
4. Concept of time
Most women enjoy being fashionably late and will either have a different sense of time to men or simply care less about it. We might say we’ll be ten minutes when we actually need another half hour at least. It’s better to wait, though. If we’re rushed and forget something, we’ll be seething for hours.
5. Over-thinking the little things
We might spend ages picking an outfit or perusing the restaurant menu despite having claimed to be ravenous. Ladies like things to be perfect, even if they are seemingly unimportant.
6. Holding grudges
Most women are guilty of holding onto various instances of resentment until we can’t any more, suddenly exploding into a rage over an apparently unidentified cause. We deal with anger differently, okay?
When it comes to the opposite sex, women can act even stranger than normal. Here are the most confusing things we do regarding men:
7. Mixed signals
We’re flirty the whole night, then we act all coy. We don’t necessarily mean to give out mixed signals, but that’s just the way women are.
8. The appeal of the “bad guy”
He’s got looks and charm but treats her terribly, yet she still adores him! Most women do actually want a nice guy, however, a bad guy keeps a girl on her toes. We fall for the dangerous side of him, always believing he’ll change into that nice guy because he loves us. It never happens, and if it did, we’d probably stop being attracted to him. We’ll never learn.
9. Mind games
Men think women play mind games, while women believe men play mind games. Women can be misleading in what they say or do because they’re trying to outwit their male counterpart. We can’t get our heads around the fact that men are generally being straight up.
10. Claiming to not care about special occasions
We may claim to not care whether we get a card or present for occasions like birthdays, anniversaries and Valentine’s Day, but we almost certainly do. Always play it safe and never forget an important date.
11. Double standards
We say we don’t want to be chained to the kitchen sink but we like having the door opened for us. We don’t want to do DIY but we do want you to cook us dinner. We simply want to have our cake and eat it – who doesn’t?
12. ‘It’s not you, it’s me’
The female of the species may be fairer, but she certainly has some quirky habits! Let’s take a look at the most confusing of these:
13. Going to the loo with a friend
This is one ritual that’s here to stay. Unfortunately, what gets discussed during these group toilet trips is strictly confidential, so you’ll have be satisfied with the knowledge that it’s all part of the complex female bonding process.
14. Claiming to be okay
Many a man has fallen at the ‘I’m okay’ hurdle. When a woman says she’s okay, she’s more than likely not okay and seeking a kind word or gesture. Take your pick from apologising, suggesting a treat or offering a hug.
We could be considered obsessive when it comes to text messages and posts on social media. We analyse the wording, number of kisses and time taken to respond to us. Our brains simply can’t cope with the possibility that there aren’t any hidden meanings in men’s messages.
16. Handbags that weigh a tonne
We carry our entire lives in our handbags. Yes, we probably would put the kitchen sink in there if we could.
17. Clean house, dirty car
It’s a brave person that walks mud over a lady’s freshly-cleaned carpet. However, her car may resemble a pigsty. We only have so much time for cleaning so we prioritise, alright?
18. Bitching about mates
So we chat about a friend’s terrible choice of outfit or how she unashamedly sucked up to the boss last week. Men do it too, they just tend to say it to their mates’ faces, whereas women bitch as a way to cope with insecurities. We were actually too shy to buy that revealing outfit and suck up to the boss.
19. Pillow obsession
Pillows and cushions are good. You can never have too many. Deal with it.
Whether a woman is a slave to designer labels or a sassy boho chick, fashion plays a huge part in the lives of all females, so it’s no surprise men are confused by the following:
20. ‘Does my bum look big in this?’
To clarify, your female friend’s bum never looks big, in this or any other outfit. Add a genuine compliment for extra brownie points (even if she bites your head off).
21. ‘Which dress should I wear?’
Sadly, whichever dress you pick, the answer is likely to be wrong. Don’t sweat it, just say she’ll look amazing in either of them. If pushed for a decision, be honest and don’t be offended if she wears the other one.
22. Using too much makeup
Popular culture dictates wearing a lot of makeup, from foundation to false eyelashes. While some lucky ladies are confident enough to go without or wear just enough to enhance their features, if we cake it on, it’s because we’re insecure about our looks. We may not change overnight, but keep telling us if you think we look better without makeup and it could make a real difference.
Women love shopping, and many men are confused by our approach:
Shopping is something that many women do for pleasure, particularly when it comes to clothes. We probably won’t take any notice of your opinion, we are going to visit all our favourite shops and we may spend ages in the changing rooms before discarding most of our selections. Sorry!
24. Shoes and handbags
Do we really need dozens of pairs of uncomfortable-looking shoes and designer handbags? No, of course not. And yes, some of those shoes are really uncomfortable and yes, we can only use one bag at a time. But we can’t help loving them!
25. Forgetting how much things cost
We remember that one time you ditched us for your mates yet we can’t remember how much that spangly new dress cost. Okay, we do know, but it makes us so happy that the extortionate price tag is irrelevant, right?
With any luck, this list will have enlightened you about some of the strange and amusing things that men find confusing about women. To summarise, women are always right, we generally mean the opposite of what we say and often a loving hug will sort us right out.